Thursday, September 04, 2008

I cried

Sam started school yesterday. It's just pre-K. But it's not that pansy kind of pre-K, all singing and playing and snack time. No, this is the real thing. All day, every day at a public school with eighth graders! And there's going to be some hard-core learning at this pre-K, I'm told, a regimented curriculum of letters and numbers animal sounds.

So this is serious stuff, and it's no wonder that I cried when I dropped Sam off. Right? Right?

Also, before you judge me for being a hyper-emotional maniac*, you should know that Sam was also crying, clinging to my leg and running out of the room after me screaming "I want to go to your class, Mom! I want you to stay with me forever."< At that point, I knew that it would only get worse if Sam saw me tearing up, so I had to turn my back and walk away while a classroom aide shuffled him back to the classroom.

The good news is the first day was only a half day, and the parent orientation ("my class") was pretty short. I was back to Sam's classroom within an hour, and found him sitting in a tall cubby, holding his frog blanket. When he saw me, he asked "Mom, can you snuggle me a little bit?" (Cue waterworks.) The aide told me he sat in that cubby the whole time, but he didn't cry. I wish the same were true for me.

The even better news, though, is that I really like this school. And I like his teacher even more. In a district full of failing schools, we lucked in to one in "good standing" with a teacher who is not just "highly qualified," but kind, patient, and down-to-earth. So, I think that if Sam can bring himself to leave his cubby, he'll have a really great year. Me too. I think.

*A fair assessment, considering my track record with public waterworks: the rental car place, the doctor's office, Wal-Mart. Yep, I'm a basketcase.

**I should note that "forever" to Sam means something like "until I think of something else." But, I should also not that apparently he has not yet thought of something else, because just moments ago as he buttoned himself into his school clothes, he came in and told me "Mom, today, I don't want you to do what the teacher says. I want you to stay with me in my class."


Peanut said...

It's no wonder that you cried. I think I need to be snuggled a bit too.
I almost called you last night to see how the first day went for all of you.
I hope today has less tears.

Mrs. Donut said...

Girl, you cry. You just cry and cry and cry. It's not fair that those kids of ours get so big and grown-up and go off to pre-K and even regular school and stuff. It breaks my heart still, and Eliza's been in big grown-up school for going on five years now! And she still tells me that she missed me while she was at school. I know it makes you sad to think of being away from him and sitting in his cubby. So you just cry and I'll cry with you. And one day, when you come to get him and he doesn't want to go home because he has become Mr. Independent and the Big Man at Pre-K, you can cry some more. And write a post about it so we can all affirm your tears and cry with you some more. I love you!

Betzy & Brandon said...

Awww! I almost cried just imagining what it must've been like...for both of you. I don't want to even think about when Nissi starts school. I'm having a hard time with her learning to stand up on her own! Hang in there so you can help me when my time comes.HEHE!

Stephanie said...

Oh, poor baby! I'm sure he'll start to love it very soon. How did his little sister handle it all? Don't feel bad about crying. I cried the day before. The only reason I didn't cry the day of was because I had to be strong for my littlest one who was sobbing. Which by the way...she is still doing on day 4!

Princess Gerty said...

It is reassuring to know other moms cry. I sure have. Well, I guess I just usually want to, but don't always have the tears. But, none of my kids have ever cried. I think that would really set me off.

brent and kashann said...

So cute! (the video). You are making me very glad Caroline is still home with me this year. Sam is going to be so much smarter though! He already is so ahead.